Hi.

Sorry for my slow progress.

I'm overwhelmed by everything. Life has been crazy and I'm trying to find ways to get my thoughts organized.

This is something I've never really done. I know the theory and the capabilities. I can look at it and generally understand it, but I've never had the time and resources I need to sit down and have it become a part of my life.

I don't learn like most people do. I actually don't know how I best learn other than by trying again and again and again. I've always been shunned for asking and receiving help.

I need to study theory and analyze existing work. I've been doing that, but I'm at a point where I don't have enough context and knowledge.

I also don't know what I'm working with. I don't know if I'm playing a co-op or pvp. I want to make the right decisions, but I still haven't figured out how everyone thinks. The last thing I want is for people to be mad at me for messing things up.

I really want to beat this game though. I want that more than anything.

I will try again tomorrow.

Pattern