<----- My perpetual mood
(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧
Me rightnow
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Hope whoever is reading this having a great day :D
I'm a bit tired. I'm currently in college and to be honest, I never wanted to go. I promised my mom and so I stuck with it. I honestly would rather learn to drive, work full time, and save up the things I've been wanting for years. I want to be open and redesign myself into the person I wish I was. I'm just too used to not deciding things for myself I guess.
I just don't know what my dream is. I'm fresh out of high school and in a major I don't even know if I'll continue to like. I mentioned my dream is to be youtuber/streamer in my first post but even so, that's not really concrete, so I continue to go to college even though I'm kinda miserable. I should get a degree regardless, good to have, but still...
Life just has no meaning, but you have to find and make your own meaning. The problem is what is my meaning? What should I do? What will make me happy? I've always tried to find meaning in expectations but that only made me miserable.
In the end, I still have such a long way to go,
being 18 doesn't mean I'm automatically a fully functional adult,
but there's still the expectation of acting and
being like one. It sucks...