yap session

i should’ve just stuck to my journal but im hella bored like Hella

• Composed on

anyways i actually have nothing to talk about tbh... hmm..... hmmmmmmmmmmm....................... just give me a second

broken social scene's self-titled album

i want to skateboard but i'm still really bad at it. there are too many obstacles in my path to becoming the skater boy of my dreams rn...

i wake up too late so it's too hot out and i just cannot take the public humiliation of trying to learn how to skate out in the open. i wish i could just stay in my backyard or garage but there's no space. also.

anyways now i can never step foot outside again out of a paralyzing fear that the UPS guy is perceiving me.

i hate being unmotivated like this but also i feel like this is my default state. i am just lazy at my core i really believe that. ugh i need to do drivers ed... i KNOW it isnt hard but i just dont even wanna do anything at all


i cannot stop thinking about when i was outside my house and this guy comes to drop off a package and he says "hey you're the kid that's always roaming around!" NOO I AM NOT... IS IT SUCH A CRIME THAT I LIKE TO ROAM...

anyways guys i really like marvel media and stuff but sometimes i'm like Wow the military propaganda is crazy. the copaganda is crazy!! i mean it's not like this is new or anything i've just been thinking about it. like i'm playing the ps4 spider-man game and why is my boy spidey just an extension of the police...

i'm really scared to go get my senior photos taken i kinda want to see if i can do it in like august instead. i booked mine for mid july but now im realizing that's pretty soon... i need to look better i really don't like my hair rn because it's too short i keep cutting it on impulse. also i have never taken a school photo and liked how it looked like Ever. i actually cant stand pictures in general i just cant be normal about them its so bad

also what if they don't have any suits in my size?? what do i do. i need to call and ask or something. my mom was like "yea i don't think they're gonna have anything for you" and i was like "yea i know... but there are short guys so maybe they will" and she was like "yeah but not short like you"

okay Ouch. okay whatever. like i don't even care it's like whatever.

that aside i like the game i really wanna get the 100% completion suit (it's literally just spider-man wearing nothing but his underwear and a mask im like lol Hey hi. that was weird somebody just typed that into my computer. the demons.... the demons r trying to tarnish my good name again..............)

completely unrelated but ive been thinking about this one tiktok that i saw that a lot of ppl liked/ reposted about neopronouns and i'm like. literally who gives a flying fuck "oh they make the community look bad oh people aren't gonna respect us" i dont fw respectability politics they're not gonna respect us either way. and i dont think the end goal of any marginalized communities' movement should be appeasing the people who dont even like them. and who cares if you think it's weird if they're not hurting anyone why does it even matter.

normalize being a weirdo freak loser because ultimately every single one of us is going to die and when your time is running out you're not gonna regret the fact that you didn't fit in you're gonna regret that you denied yourself things that made you happy.

quote me on that Yea. k i made this post like way too long this lowkey took me all day. like i said i do literally nothing. all day. Until next time interweb

guys im not gonna lie sometimes i resent how its so normal to make fun of guys for their height. i know its not that deep and im never gonna tell people that. but like idk i don't like feeling like my body is funny. sorry 2 deep maybe. i need to just thug it out but idk how.

im thinking i should get piercings and maybe i will be like Yay! i look awesome. i want an industrial ear piercing but idk if i have the anatomy for it :( same with like an eyebrow piercing. and i want just like a second piercing on my lobes or smth... ive been entertaining the idea of a septum piercing but my parents would probably not like it. but i feel like its a good face piercing to get because if i regret it its not even like the scars gonna show and its an easy piercing to hide if i need to. yk?

this is the only album i've been listening to lately and i mean that in the sense that i'm trying to listen to the whole thing but it's taken me like days to get through it. not because it's bad!!! i enjoy it a lot but i just am not listening to music constantly right now Like i said... sigh.... someone should make me a playlist or smth bc idk what to do with myself im like Help me help me!!!

anyways broken social scene rocks tbh

okay i have been in like a creative rut lately. like i cannot draw and i cannot get myself to write any music... i don't even listen to music rn... like on a day to day basis i do not put on a playlist or ANYTHING... it's really sad like why am i a freak doing things in dead silence. i'm gonna fix that right now actually and put on some tunes.

it's that time of year again. and by that time of year i mean i am once again reaching the point in summer break in which i don't sleep until 7 am and wake up at 4 pm even though i do absolutely nothing all day and time is just one big blur and i don't want to leave the house or my room and i don't feel like a real person. Haha. sorry maybe oversharing on the internet is a bad idea actually this is why i bought a journal

HELLO INTERWEB. sorry bad joke. HELLO INTERNET. i think that i do not overshare on the internet ENOUGH!! sometimes i'm like Yea i wanna get in on that. so that is what i am doing 2day. because i am inexplicably bored.

two trans guys in a room

they might kiss (no they wont. sry to disappoint.)

• Composed on

this is a 100% accurate visual representation of what he looks like Btw.

"what happened to you"



it was kinda silly because what the hell are the odds that we needed to go to the nurse at the exact same time. and so he was like


i was still cramping Bad but i took painkillers. they didn't work and i was literally dying on and off throughout the whole school day... so in my 6th period i decided to go to the nurse. the lady gave me a heating pad. i was sitting there for a while and i was just on my phone and i was listening 2 this album

HI GUYS WUT IS UP! 2day i am here to talk to you about my day and how i wish i had a boyfriend.

there are literally like a total of 5 queer guys in my grade. life is hard. however i am here to talk about One guy in particular and that guy is My Man

hes literally the cutest guy ever and it's so embarrassing for me but i have the fattest crush on him ever ITS SO BAD. it's bad because we literally DO NOT SPEAK. we have zero classes together. but we do have mutual friends! but our interactions consist of waving to each other in the halls and making awkward eye contact and then looking away very quickly.

HOWEVER!!! today was a special day. today the universe looked at me and said Luka. i want you to suffer. but for compensation i will give you a little treat.

this will make sense later trust

basically i woke up in the morning with HORRIBLE cramps. not to be vulgar but. my boypussy is a burden and a blessing.

i was literally struggling to get ready in the morning but because i have my priorities straight i still managed to rummage through my closet and find my spider-man socks.

mind u this is the most speaking ive done with this man in weeks. last time we talked it was just him asking me if i wanted a sticker (HE GAVE ME A FLOWER STICKER he basically wants me)

and so we were both sitting there for like a minute in silence. but we were both on our phones so it was chill.

but then i was like. i need to speak to my man when else am i going to be able to!! and he was wearing a spider-man shirt so Naturally i told him i liked his shirt. he was like thx :) and then i was like

wait. check this out.

and i pulled up my pants leg to reveal my spider-man socks


not rly relevant information but. ive been trying to find new music and this is pretty bomb so go listen if u so desire

anyways eventually the conversation ended and we were sitting there in silence again but i think we are both sort of quiet guys. so this was the best i couldve hoped for.

im literally so teeheehee i need to be his friend RIGHT NOW!!!!!! and then i need to be his boyfriend. i would like to talk to him again plsss but i literally dont know how to talk to people if we are not in forced proximity UGHGHHGHGHGHHGGH.

also i never found out what he went to the nurse for. i forgot to ask. sigh.

i think i am literally insane for dedicating a blog post to someone i've had exactly one full conversation with. WHY DID I WRITE SO MUCH TOO somebody sedate me this is so stupid

having a crush is too embarrassing guys i need a bullet to the brain.

anyways. that's it! if i ever interact with my guy again i will update.


BYE BYE!!!!!!!

- luka koopa troopa

"there's been trails of confetti following me everywhere i go. for the past few days." - his words (approximately)

< not that anyone cares but for reference these are the socks. they are mildly important to the story.

he seemed to appreciate the spider-man socks tho. and so we talked abt spider-man for a while. he asked me who my favorite was and tbh i dont rly know! but i said miles bc hes on my socks. and tbh he kind of reminds me of miles just because he writes in like graffiti art on stickers and puts them all around the school

anyways he was like im so sad they postponed the next movie and i was like IKR it was supposed to come out near my birthday. Sighs. idk what else we said. but then he asked me what class i have next door WHICH MEANS hes paying attention to how i have a class next to him. actually that shouldnt be surprising bc we kind of see each other going into class every day but Wtv...

but i was like. i have stats... and he was like Damn. i said that i didnt like stats and idk why i did this to myself. i actually am writing this instead of doing my stats work. ohhh my god i have so much stats work to catch up on guys dont mind me

but so then we talked about our classes for a while. he TA's for the world religion class thats next door to my stats :3 and then i couldnt think of anything else to say. so i was like.

why do you have confetti on your hair

great conversation starter guys 10/10 would recommend

its because he had one of those confetti eggs cracked on his head