TW: R@pe (suicide) and uh you will find spelling mistakes
hi hi. It late for me and I just wanted to say uhm my past is rlly bad and not just bad. But I been thinking abt on my own and also talking to a therapist and its more bad then I thought I think bc I wrote fucking noncon without even thinking about it tbh. I don't know why I did that LMAO but tbh I feel dumb and sorry that I did that but I dont think anyone would accpect my sorry at all. sigh I hate my self to the point I want to die lowkey tbh but like I cant idk bc I want to outlive what my mom thinks (get a stable life) if I cant do that I dont think I will impress anyone tbh... I want to get that off my chest feels a bit better but what I did in the old /hwang server is so bad.... but like srsly why did I fake a fucking disorder and for a fucking role... I feel fucking dumb. but like no I dont know If I can outlive my mom. I am getting better irl but Idk if I am truly getting better. I need to fucking STOP just like stop if I can but I dont think I can omg. I hate myself... so much tbh. Idk why I am like this. If I could even be bettter I would but like I dont think god wants me being better LOL. idk