my really (un)interesting thoughts #13

hello typical weekly oversharing Sesh

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new theme Who Dis. hello my monyayers! omg kraftwerk started playing im gonna Explode i luv dem. welp! i had NNOO SCHOOOL today and it was so Awesome. jk i kind of sat around and watched hermitcraft and danny gonzalez all day.. awkward.. but DESERVED omg i spent my whole weekend sat and sun doing school work morning to night no exaggeration. they were not lying about this year being tough. idk how im gonna make it Tbh. but whatever. its debrief time anyways soo. lesson today. Kingdontsurf. was HERE. ty. Sigh. im always so sweaty. and he's like consistently doing that thing where he sits like 2 freaking inches away bro calm DOWN JESUSSS. well i was doing freaking whatever triplet comping but with the kick and it SUCKS i wwas so nervous. i think im way better NOT in that darn classroom because of the Pressure. so i act like im worse than i am. LOL. like wut. like im focusing trying so hard. BUT ITS SO EMBARASSING to mes up. anyways i was Lowk struggling and it didn't sound even at all even. but Whatever. anyways my King isaac walked in and wuz like Hey Brookeee and i was like Omg Hai and he was like NICO JUST MAKING SURE UR GONNA SHOW HER THIS *shows thing on his phone*. and nico was like Yah i will dont you fret. and then he left. AND NICO GIVES A LOOK>??? and he SAID "hes trying to steal u from me because he knows ur a good student" WHATAAATTTT DA FRICKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK

awesome songs this week:


"Fun in my head

Is this real or a dream instead?

This is where I wanna be'

Cause it's just way too fun to leave"


LOL. so basically i think i win!. Jk. Hah. anyways.. i do it and i suck but then hes like "well you know when my Pal isaac is doing (insert some complicated super hard drum word).. it doesnt sound perfect because its not lined up.. but its still Super Awesome and Impressive and Wow. and thats liek you". and like.. i dont think what i was doing was... even CLOSE to whatever that thing he was talking about.. so Maybe an over.. reaction? idk. but Thanks. i take what i can get. even though i nnKJFHKJFGHLKFJ. OK and then so we movevd onto combining kick and snare in comping with triplet and stuff IDK THE REAL WORDS and im Like 'omg i Liek trad grip now.. its easier" and he was like Oh Yeah how did u do it.. and i was like I looked up a tutorial. and he was like SHOW ME. (JESUS CHRIT). and im like sweating shaking and hes like "y ur hands r shaking Lol" HELPPPPPP WUT DA HECK. and so i show him and he GRABS MY FFREAING HAND AAGAIN CALM DOWN. not rly. but hewas like Yah dats good. but anyways backstory i ate a whole bag of xtra spicy hot cheetos yesterday and they stained my fingers red and i HATE THAT. and i was FREAKING OUT because i was like Omg hes gonna see my nnasty fingers even worse now. but i scrubbed in the shower. so problem averted. BUT STILL. anyways i was like "its a lot of pressure Haha". WTF.


WHO SAYS THAT. and why am i ALWAYS SHAKING? Jeussus Christ. well i was fact speakin'. trad grip Feels cool but also like i think im better doinfg triplets or WHatevr. and he was like Yah ur better with trad grip i can tell! and i was like Aw Thx >_<<. well anyways i learned Crazy things. (we just combined kick and snare with the triplet comping thing). and i was Okay. i like practinc that Stuxfx. and being good later. and then i don't evnen know what i learned it was like triplet 16th stuff Da frick i dont know. but Trying my best. and it was ok.. i need to get better at not zoning out at people talking about things i think it's my worst trait. i habe suchh a hard time keeping attenion at that stuff. i need to see it. tto get it. maybbee.. idk. well we moved to my Dreaded. Piano. that i avoided for like two weeks because COMPING :CRY EMOJI:. and like Broooooke. god idk waht it is. with my comprehension. but i SUCK AT MEMORIZING CHORD INVERSIONS and SCALE STUFF. god. like SUCK SUCK. and like. EVERYONE knows that. Sigh. well we did Not jump straight into comping and Took it slow which was sooo much better. and i think i got it the most ive ever gotten it! so i think i will not avoid mmy piano this week. but im so impatient. sitting there an inverting a chord for 10 minutes is SO BORING!!!! ill try my best. well anyway he told me to like visit my schools and talk to da jazz band room but that sounds terrifying.

"If I rewind my baby

If I rewind, rhythm and knowledge, get

I rewind my baby

Every color of you"

my best jazz finds this week:


and also the tning isac was talking about was this like Teen music night or something where Teens come and play music.. it wasnt a jazz thing jsut a Thing. but i think i will go.. its kinda far though. maybe ill invite my Biffle Bae to come with. heeheheehe :3. but he was like Yeah i can try and u could play stuff.. which is WAY outside my comfort zone so idk but its on march 1. so proabbly not. i kinda wanna go just for the nice community or whatever. get out there. meet people. try something new. maybe there waill be a Cool lesbian musician girl . PLEASE. PLEASE. UGHHHHHHH. well anyways. thats it. OH and LOOL like a couple weeks ago i had to back out when leaving wahetevr and my CAR WAS PARKED NEXT TO KINGDONTSURF. and i was so scared. and today he was like Haha i saw you backing out Lol hows dat permit. and i was like i GOT MY LICENSE! and he was like "Oh yeah do u know what to do when you HYDROPLANE?" and i was like.. Idk waht hydroplaning is. and he told me. LOLLL.. ok that was it today. in what happened. anyways. the absolute LOVE of my LIFE made this new playlist with some Fire Beats that i love and im SO MAD SHE HAS A GIRLFRIEND BECAUSE OH MY GOD. she is SO COOL. and her girlfriend. IS EVIL AND HORRIBLE (im not joking. shess actually a weird person). and im so SICK of seeing them together. I NEED HER SOOO BAD. ONLY I CAN UNDERSTAND HER AND HER SOFICISITICATEDNESS! i Hate lesbians. is it weird if im liking her playlists or Naw. well she followed me back on spotify so. but she BLOCKED ME FROM HER STORY on main. but whatevr. idc. im playing the long game and waiting for her and her STUPID MEAN girlfriend to breakup. JUST YOU WAIT. sigh. OMG i just spotted my biffle bae listneing to my FAVE mils davis song on spotify im about to Bust. i love it.

"Walk round this fucking town

I like when you're not around

I hate when you call

I don't want nothing from you at all"


A CLASSIC! but so. so. GOOD! OH M OGOODDDD it scratches every itch i cant even describe it. reminds me of when i was obsessed with darcy lynn and that. but now its in like.. a different way. hits JUST AS HARD!!! Luv u charchar.

the drums in this song is so FIRE. specifically in this version! i THINK its with brushes which is SOOO COOLLLLL wat da frick.. idk dont quote me on that. BUT it is sooooo awesoMMEE oh mah god i found isaac's spotify because Obvi i did and Ty he put me onto this Banger on one of his playlistss.. my BOSS(a nova)

so Fire. yayy. dude. school is genuinely making me so crazy im gonna lose it. i have nonstop homework every night the only option i have is to grindddddddd. and freaking envirothon meetings are gonna start meeting AFTERSCHOOL UNTIL 6:30 THREE TIMES A WEEKUHHHH. oh mtn GBOODSSdsd im gonna lose it. i love you envirothon. but Jesus. Chrsist. im gonna lose my mind. ap seminar grind is insane and so stressful. idk how im gonna have time to be normal. even this 3 DAY WEEKEND i barely have time. dude. every week is just passing and passing now. its like theres no end. week then weekend week then weekend. idk what changed but its so much and so so mcuh. im FOR REAL IN PURGATORY oh naw. i wish i was able to do cool productive things like go out and take pics or maybe collage or even read but oh man. Ohhh Mannn. it. is tough. to stay motivated. ive been trying sooooooo hard to keep the mindset but life and everything is so overwhelming i can barely just stop to breathe for a second!!! in EVERYTING! asb is insane. speaking of... applications are opening and i think i am going to EXPLODE. because idk if someone is gonna go against me for historian and im so scared im gonna pee everywhere genuinely PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE LET NO ONE GO AGAINST ME PLEASE LET EVERYONE BE AFRAID OF ME. this is the BIGGEST deal of my life. and Jesus God. if ssome first year freaking newbie beats me for historian because shes a popular girl cheerleader i'll genuinely. Eye. Twitch. Trying. SO. Hard. but election results come out on my BIRTHDAY oh HECK NAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

well i think my passion is watching what people are listening to on spotify... its so fun. like i know.. what ur doing rn. HeHe. OMG also i applied to TWO SUMMER INTERNSHIPS THIS WEEKEND!! so i feel decently accomplished like YAY !!! i hope i get accepted into the ycc yellowstone one. because i want to live in a secluded forest for a month without my phone, hours and hours away from.. everyone i know.. that CRAZY!!! but so awesome. PLEASE ACCEPT ME!!! well. i conclude this monyay pondering the question: WHY IS CHET BAKER BANNED? I NEED TO KNOW RIGHT NOW. but maybe i will never know. thanks all my monyayers for making this monyay possible. love and hearts and kisses to all you on the internetzzies :3

my really (un)interesting thoughts #12


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good evening the internet! annnd i wish you a......

song this week goes to!


YAY! finally it is monyay and we have a whole week ahead of us. trying to stay so excited... like its valentines day! im super excited :3 i am gonna hangout with my two BIFFLES and also go to youth groups... :3 which is awesome.. im so exctied! ohhh Man. okk. i had a substitue teacher today in my music lesssons!! no Kingdontsurf... Sigh. jk. it was actually so aweosme. i had this guy named isaac as my teacher and he was super cool! he was super chill so i felt comfortable to like talk and stuff (cough NATE THE FREAK cough. i hate seeing him.). welp! i liked this guy isaac a loottt! i like how he viewed things.. it was cool. also he explained things good. like... he explained music like it was a sentence and every little measure you play is a word! and i was like Wow mind blown dats awesome! and he was funny.. he taught me like listening and copying things and Ugh. right after i got good at reading sheet music BAM hes telling me NOT TO read sheet music Ugh. but i did good i think. and he taught me techniques for hitting the kick faster... and he taught me better than the youtube videos i watched! it was pretty awesome. and also he said that Nico told him ALL about me. and that FREAKED ME OUT. when people say that ITS SO SCARY!?? "oh ya ive heard ALL about you".. WHAT DO YOU MEAN.

"Bring the world together, only to tear it apart. Document the moment, thought it'd make great art. Testify to no one, the message is so clear. The ones you choose to lead you are the ones that you should fear"

song this week goes to!


like thats genuinely terrifying. but he was like Yah he said he thought u were Supa Cool and Sick cuz its cool u r interested jaz. (not quoted. something like that..). and i was like Hah. yay. Thanks. welll.. anyways. he taught me. he also like started to sing in cursive??? it was funny... like he was singing along to his favorite song (satin doll.. IDK WHICH VERSION THOUGH IM TRYING TO FIND IT BUT I CANT.) but in CURSIVE? LOL. muscians. sooo..funny.. well anyways. he also started like yelling lowkey like he kept on brininging out freaking satin doll as an example and he like yelled YEP LETS BRING BACK SATIN DOLL HAHAHA. ok king i think i know ur fave song. but overall he was great! and he also tuaght me things i already knew.. but he didn't know that so Meh. BRO DID NOT HELP ME FREAKING COMP ON THE STUPID PIANO. oh my GOD. this WHOLE week i have been freaking the freak out because i don't freaking know how to comp and nico told me to practice comping. Eye Twitch. it got so bad this past week i was jsut staring at those STUPID papers all like. bro. WtaFRICK DO I DO. IM IN HWLL. and i was so scared for today because i was gonna show up with NOTHING TO SHOW FOR. NO COMPING. just sadness and a lack of ability to comprehend any jazz theory. but NO i had a SUB. so it was 1. relieving that i didn't have to go through the sadness of going to class not being able to do what he told me to practice. but also 2. NOW I HAVE TO SEE NICO NEXT WEEK AND STILL NOT KNOW HOW TO COMP. and itll be WORSE cuz i had MORE TIME. and ISAAC DIDN"T EVEN HELP ME. he taught me fifths and stuff. BRO. (it was good stuff tho. thx.)

"And in leather, lace and chains, we stake our claim. Revolution once again. No I won't, I won't wear it on my sleeve. I can see through this expression and you know I don't believe. Too old to be told, exactly who are you? Tonight, tomorrow's too late"

"I heard a sigh up in the sky.

Coming from Jupiter or Venus;

Is it a warning out of love

Or planets trying to defeat us?"

another song obsession:



OMG but also isaac was like Omg btw if i know any jazz shows that aren't 21+ and not super late i will totally send the info ur way!! and i was like Omg No Way. SO AWESEOME. THANKS!!! well anyways. Here's to ANOTHER WEEK of being stressed out about comping on the piano. idk waht it is. im pretty confident i can comp in the drums more or less. but idk. i think i suck at my scales. Thanks a lot. UGH. I WATCHED YOUTUBE TUTORITALS AND EVERYTHING. but Naw. so embarassing bro. UGH. it okay i will power. on. and maybe try really hard this wekk. but im really stressed out.. i have so much work in school its insane. how do i only have three academic classes and school is this hard? im so freaked out. and i have NO TRUST in ANY group work oh my god EVERYONE LETS ME DOWN. or maybe im just a control freak. but bro... i have a AP seminar presentation.. and im SO scared of these two girls in my group because i read their individual essays and.... Yeah. im so scared. and this is gonna count towards my AP SCORE. Bro. Praying me and my good Pal other group member (Hai :3) will be able to make it good.. i just have no trust. and ASB oh my GOD NOBODY IN THERE KNOWS HOW TO DO ANYTHING and i have to DO EVERYTHING MYSELF!! and i get NO CREDIT cuz no one in there LIKes MEEE. Sigh. Naw... i got to stay pawsitive. i am just frustrated. but idk. u learn. and u live. and im Livin. and Learnin. yis. YAY! and it will pass..!!! :D PLS BROOKE KEEP THE MINDSET.

oh man. my eyes are burning and i need to sleep. but i have SO MANY THOUGHTS TODAAYAYYY. do u think i write too much words.. Brah. DUDE my earring fell out of my ear and now im earring-less. shoutout to my glorious biffle af to lending me ur one earring.. out of ur ear.. for like 4 hours. also today my little cousin called me (hes like 10) and we played aninmal crossing together he is SOOO CUUTTEEE!!!i love him so much! i showed him my island (that i haven't logged into in 2 years and 3 months) and he was really impressed and Jelly. Haha He mad im Gud (hes 10. and his island is poorly decorated... sucker.) JK. i gave him 4 million bells because i love him and he likes fnaf. my glorious king. i was like him that age except i liked warrior cats and was on amino. he has WAY too much internet access for being 10. but Yk thats just how it Be. omg also. i kinda realized.. i feel like i live under a FREAKING ROCK. oh my GOD. i was on call with this group of people i dont RLY talk to but for some reason they invited me to their minecraft server and im like idk branching out and Bro. i swear to god i live under a rock because i do not know how to talk to people like that. all Da References. and IDK WHAT EVEN. im just so glad im not a man. who's Weird. but actually it was interesting getting different perspecitves of people yk? i feel like i honestly only talk to my two friends ever so i was like wow these people are sooooooo different.... than them... Yeah. but like. im glad i have my 2 friends. because. i like how they are.. and how they act.. i got lucky I Think. im glad they r the peeps i ended up with in the end!

honestly i have no idea if the intrument in this song is a xylaphone or a vibraphone or another type of phone but i LOVE THIS INSTRUMENT SOUND it it soooo nice and happy and it just makes u feel so happy. im like HeHeHe when im listening to dis. my eyes r burnign Bro wtf.

oh my GOSHSH this song is SOO FIRE all 10 minutes and 3 seconds bro. even though the alvum cover is kinda funny. i Luv dis song. i feel liek im in black in white and like a detective solving a crime or soemthing. if that doesnt sound silly.. Hah.

my jazz faves dis week!!!!



i also love my sister so much! and my sister is living out MY FREKAING LESBIAN DREAMS. OH MY GOD. iM so SICK. she is like DATING A GIRL RN (her first girl shes ever dated!??!) HELLO? this is NOT real. 2024. WOW. and THIS GIRL SOUNDS SOOO COOL shes a lesbian and so cool and LIKES MY SISTER??? DA FRICK. and she got her flowers and pays for her meals and all that and i cant rly tell if my sister rly likes her. Talking from experience a girls first romantic thing with a girl that came from my Fam is Ussually Not Good and usually pretty bad for the other person. and im scared of that happening to my sister but maybe im just projecting and shes older and such. but Yk. it's scary. but im glad me and my sister can relate on some levels in that way. it's nice knowing we have the same experiences in terms of family and likke. Idk. You know. she came home this weekend and told me abt her new girl date btw. but now shes back in college. I miss her. but im also scared of her... theres somethign about her.. shes super go with the flow. idk. its intersting and idk if i can explain it here. anywayssssss. i played poppy playtime yesrtday and i was so scared. i want to watch the walten files but SOMEONE doesnt wanna watch it with me and i know if i ask my otehr friend she wont want to either.Brah. WOAH you can bold text on here??? thats cool. AND ITALICS? Awesome. also btw i figured out how to hold a stick traditionally and i think i WIN! and its way easier and its cool.. its kinda like holding chopsticks except its a giant thick drumstick and its only one. kinda. Lol. I WIN!

well my glorious multiverse i am literally about to fall asleep and i have to SHOWER IN THE MORNING. so. here's to another amazing monyay! and here's to this next week being so AMAZING! and here's to me watching the etho video soon becasue i had no time today :(((( i love you all on the internet :3

my really (un)interesting thoughts #11


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(they are friendly!!!)

haiyoooooo the internet!!!!!!


it is me. Brooke. again. Hmm. just Chillin!

and maybe its because im a lesbian (my favoeite excuse) that is why i don't get the ""hate ur ex"" thing. and also all the friends she was talking to.. like.. its not weird to still follow me!?? i still consider those people my friends and i would 100% wave or say hi.. but i just know they would make it some weird thing like "ohh omg -'s EX just WAVED! what a weirdo!" i get supporting your friends and all thaat and i know breakups are weird things. but i think we as a world make them weirder than they should be. especially when there was no like Horrible Peoeple involved.. just two people that didn't work together. so it sucks to hear that they are talking about me like that. i think that regret is a silly thing and the world focuses on the past too much and changing it and all too much to realize the lessons that are learned from them! you are giving too much power to something uncontrollable, so why not try to make it the best u can?

bro. im freaking trying to learn STUPID JAZZ SCALES!! on this DARN PIANO!!! but its SO HARD!!! what da FRICK is a lydian dominant diminished whatever I DONT EVEN KNOW!!!! its like im trying to be taught but i cant REMEMBER anything cause theres so much and im soooo frusterated bro. i dont think im cut out for this i was failed when i was only taught major and minor (the weird kind! NOT EVEN THE NORMAL MINOR KIND!) scales for 10 years. Bro. now i just feel like everything is like 10 times harder to comprehend and ill never get it like i wasnt made for this!!! im watching youtube videos and reading in between the freaking lilnes of these worksheets and nothing is clicking. i think ive spent too long blaming the teacher and it's time to blame myself for being BADDDD! comping is so hard and i cant even start anything! im DONE FOR!! DONE FOR!!! but i will try.. and persist.. one day ill be good hopefully. Trying Trying Trying.


i think hating ur ex is dumb in that circumstance! i mean idk!! my ex Girlf did some bad things to me and im sure i did some bad things to them, too, but i don't think it was on a level where we need to hate eachother? i was the one to break up with her and like.. it just didn't work out.. we had kind of gotten to a toxic level that was bad for both of us. i hold zero hatred or resentment or regret towards them at all! in fact, i would love to still talk to them!but no, theres this weird stigma whatever on "ohh shes ur ex.. lets all HATE HER GUTS and UNFOLLOW HER because she SUCKS and shes ur EX!" its dumb! and i know she has that towards me and all her friends too. LIKE once i was trying to be friendly when i bumped into her & waved at her!(NORMAL? THAT NOT EVEN WEIRD). and she gave me the nastiest look i've ever recieved. like bro! we used to be like. best friends! its been 3 months! why the hate?

welp. today my friend told me that she overheard my ex girlf and also my ex biffle talking about me with their friends during lunch. Sigh. she said that they were talking to their other friends abt how they still follow me and i post or say weird things or something idk (she said she couldnt catch mostly of what they were saying since it was loud). Sigh. i think that the whole whatever modern culture of exes is so dumb! and i dont think its that deep. i mean yeah, if someone is an awful horrible person obviously thats valid to hate them if they r ur ex or if some nasty drama happened. im talking about when its like.. more chill.. when u just don't work out because it doesnt! doesnt mean anyone is a bad person, it just doesnt work! and even in those situations people STILL make it all weird!!


maybe in the past (haha ironic) i would say i have regrets... but looking back on it (ok ironic again), i think every decision in my life has led up to THIS MOMENT and the lessons ive learned from past mistakes are so much more important than me never making those mistakes at all. and i know its been said before.. i just think its really important bc ive been watching so many people have so much regret for things that r unchangeable. or even like... attaching regret to objects and pictures and music! i know there are exceptions to this, and this is me having an OVERLY positive view on it, but ive never really gotten the like "oh i cant lsiten to this song" or "i have to throw everything they gave me out" cuz it reiminds u of whatever person. like idk embrace it! we focus SO MUCH on the bad memories that we forget the good ones. be sad they are no longer here but embrace the fun timez. i think. this is coming from a girl that still sleeps with the weighted plush my ex Girlf gave me (on the week that my cat died and i could barely get out of bed or do anything. so it meant a lot to me!) every night. and it doesnt bother me..... idk. might be because i tend to forget a lot of stuff in the past, so it kinda just feels like blurry far away good memories to me that i can barely remember. maybe. Sigh.

Bro no one shouldve given me access to this site. my oversharing powers have like multiplied by 50 billion. Sigh. YOLO i suppose. and im aware of how silly todays thoughts are and how theres so many more layers to it that i didn't say.. but its ok. ive been on such a thought journey this past couple of months.. i dont think ive ever thought this hard about the world and myself in it this hard EVER. Brah. well Hit dat like button and Smash Subscribe and Turn on notifs ty Baiiiiii. :3

my really (un)interesting thoughts #10

sweaty hands. mostly. luv monyays

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good evening my lovely friends ! :3




yay! monyay! this monyay came fast. i didnt go to school today because the rainstorm is actually insane dude! and like nobody went to school... Lol! well anyways. it was monyay as always. as always i am humbled in my musical knowledge and have to think super hard to play basic paino things. but its kinda aweosme. but i have NO IDEA what my guy was asking me to practice.. Comping... i love..that word.. (i am so terrified of actual improvising so im gonna pretend that is not basically what he asked me to do. I HATE IMPROV. something about having the pressure of having it all be up to me is terrifying. i dont trust myself to ACTUALLy come up with something good.. sigh.. but this is literally what i signed up for. literally all jazz is... is improv basically.. like Bro. Deal with it. i need to trust in myself.. but while someone is watching is Omg.)

well. its all good fun. maybe i will Shoot him an Email and ask Pls help idk wut da frick to do Omg. ok how the hek is anyone supposed to help music through email.. BRah.. well idk. well see. but its hard. and i SUCKKKKK. Yolo tho. i live on the edge. welp.... i drummded and i WASNT super.. horrible. kinda. i played Puh-guh-duhs (i like that word but i jsut looked it up and apprently its puh-duh-duh... puh-guh-duh is better. Nico On Top.) and i sucked kinda. but im trying my best. but you know what? its SO.DAMN. HOT. in thaat DANG STUDIO. i am literally sweating the moment i walk in there. REGARDLESS OF THE WEATHER!! and today it was SOO BAD bbecause idk apparently im so tense *crying emoji* and he was like okkk... i will teach u traditional stick grip method.. just so u know. :3 and i was like Oki. and then ensued the WORST like 3 minutes of my LIFE. ok traidtional drumstick grip is the DUMBEST THING EVER IN THE STUPID WORLD I TELL YOU! omg. its like holding a thick freaking stick like a pencil but not. and let me tell you i have the most embarassing worst HANDS to ever exist as dumb as it sounds LOL.... like. its so horrible... im always so embare

"and then it's 3am i'm on the corner wearing my leather and this dude comes up to me and says 'hey punk' i'm like, yeah, whatever"

currently insanely obsessed with this song i need it like injected in me. the piano and the horns together is so beautiful its indescribable. ty nico for pmo. as always....

"i'm not that nice! i'm mean and i'm evil! don't call me nice! i'm gonna eat your heart out! i've got some work to do!"

guess who pmo..

idk what it is but this song is just so cute to me its like the horns are having a little conversation!!! like i can HEAR them just chatting! they r just little guys.. so adorable!.. Song creds Nico.

my fingers r like weirdly stupidly short. *CRY EMOJI* IDK WHY THEY R SO NOT NORMAL. and then i have freaking idk dermatilliamaniaWhatever sso my fingers are always all scabbed and they bleed like every other day and its so Awful and EMBARASSING. ok those two. PLUS. my hands were SOOOOOOOO SWEATY in that STUPID room im like actually dying in there. and i have to LEARN THIS STUPID STICK GRIP AND ITS SO HARD. WHO TF CAME UP WITH THIS? so im like laughign cuz i suck and this stupid stick is like falling out fo my hand cuz its so sweaty and my FREAKING NICDONTSURF starts grabiing my hand and ADJSUTING IT like 10 TIMES BROOO i actually wanted to die right there. bro is touching at my sweaty short scabbed up hand and i like can't hold this stupid stick right and i kept just laughing awkwardly cuz i suck. and also i dont think i can even recreate that stupid grip. without.. flashbacks. i was so embarased. (not really. just caught off gaurd didnt think we'd be freaking holding hands today bro. Chillax.) LOL. well anyways. he did say to me and i qUOTE! "brooke i am very impressed!" when i Comped. like triplet.. things.. idk what the words are. BUT I THINK I WIN! HES IMPRESSED!


YAY! it all pays off. i think right now this is a really awesome and fun interest. that im obsessed with rn! andi like my interests. like rhythm heaven and hermitcraft. i love them too much. :3 well.. anyway. i can see myself improving a lot! i think it's really cool to subconsciously improve in things... like one day you can't do something and then you try it again a while later and suddenly you can magically DO IT! it is such a good feeling. that happened to me! i can play so many faster songs i couldn't play (and tried to) before just because i have improved! and like oh man. going through constant change is just such an awesome thing, and im glad i have control of myself and my actions... lol.... if that sounds silly.. :3 i can now play some of my fave heavenly songs! and i can play becky by byop SO GOOD! my mom gifted me this amazing victorian style sticker book today and im rly excited about it! luv stickers!! i decorated my folders and such. HeHe. i don't want to go out in the rain tomorrow to school... literally the leader guy declared a STATE OF EMERGENCY but Whatever. at least i get to see all my buddies! Yippee! Love Those Guys.

song of da night

well i appreciate all my monyay fans (me) for tuning in this monyay. id say this was a pretty great monyay! again.. this has kindof just turned into a music progress report//music blog//idk. but Ya know i go where the wind take me (I SUPPOSE! IIIII SUPPOSE HEY!!!!!!) Stay tuned for more amazing posts this week by Me. maybe. if i have time. and motivation! i love you all on the internet :3c

moral courage & a lesson i learned

this is rly dumb and no one should give me the abiltiy to think abt things like this It’s not that Deep Bro.

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i read an article in my ap seminar class about moral courage and intelligent disobedience. for those who don't know, moral courage is defined as "the ability to stand up for and practice that which one considers ethical, moral behavior when faced with a dilemma, even if it means going against countervailing pressure to do otherwise". and obviously i had to think really hard about it because that's Who i be.

anyways, i think the universe just tested me on my moral courage and i think i just failed. and i think it was really stupid, and i don't even know why i tried so hard to argue my point. it was something super trivial like unfollowing my friends ex, except he did nothing wrong, and the breakup only had to do with her just not liking him like that. for some reason, this situation really stuck with me because the way it happened she had accepted that she is mean and toxic without making the effort not to be, so she made no efforts at all for this guy. i think there is a lot of factors that go into it, the way love is shown in your life, and we are two opposite people, especially in terms of our family, and i understand that, and i do not want to put her down for how she acts, because if anyone has a valid reason to act the way she does, she does.

well, she asked me to unfollow this guy. and idk what is wrong with me but i said no, there was no good reason too, guy did nothing wrong, it doesn't really matter since there was no harm done. he did not wrong her at all (except maybe have bad breath and also be unattractive in her eyes).

she got really mad and a whole argument ensued. what is the line between me being a good and loyal friend and me wanting to obey what i consider ethical and moral? since the initial day, i had a whole moral crisis where i there on decided if i can make the conscious effort to be a good person, i will. and i am not saying i have not been hateful or done bad things, because i definitely have and i definitely will in the future. but i want to give what i got to be nice i guess. i think especially now there is endless hate in the world, and i want to do what i can i guess. what i'm saying is, i made the rule for myself that if i can make the conscious decision to be good (although, good is a subjective term. by this, i mean ethically good in MY eyes), i will always choose the good option, even if it is the harder one. and i think i sound kind of pretentious and annoying saying that. this is kind of like another ap seminar article i read that was about like if you announce to other people that you are a virtuous person, does that really make you a truly virtuous person if you are only doing it for the validation of others? ap seminar makes me think too hard i think. Oh Man.

well anyways. i think my moral courage was tested tonight! its interesting seeing concepts you read about play out in real life. i felt it was my duty and the most ethical and moral choice to not unfollow this poor guy (it sounds so silly writing this out!). but my friend argued that it makes me a bad friend, and if i won't do this for her, i won't do anything else for her, especially considering she would undoubtedly do it for me. well, i stood my ground for so long. i like, tested the effects of moral courage. and (eventually, after arguing for like an hour and after she called me a bad friend and threatened to never talk to me again) i decided i did not want to deal with the consequences of this moral courage. so i failed. i broke my own rules and i was not morally courageous. and i know it sounds so dumb over what the topic was, but i think it is a lot deeper than whatever unfollowing a guy or not.

and maybe, by doing what i did, i was doing "good" in a different way. a lot of people argue loyalty versus morality. and i think i stand a lot more on the morality end of that spectrum. i have endless love for the people in my life, but i think maybe my morals often stand above that. however, that particular friend is extremely loyal, and i really value that about her. i think she is honestly one of the most loyal people i know and have. she once told me that i could be a horrible person to everyone around me, but she would still stand with me and support me. and that really stuck with me, because would i do the same? and i think the answer to that is really interesting, because i think it is more complicated than a yes or a no. i really value that friend, especially considering her loyalty. and i think that oftentimes, she does (honestly) a LOT of things that disagree with my morals. and they DO bother me a lot. but i will never do or say anything because her loyalty is something i value so much that those things do not matter to me, and i would stay loyal to her regardless of what she does. however, with maybe someone else, i would keep my morals above that and value morals more than my loyalties to that person. so i suppose for me, loyalty versus morals depends on the person, and it is not one-size-fits-all for me i guess.

so maybe i failed the moral courage test that the universe gave me, but i think i also learned that some fights are just not worth fighting when you have something (or someone) so important and rare at stake. someone that would do anything for me regardless of the morality of it.

although, i do think that right now, (especially since i am this age) my morals still are not straight and i do not have them all figured out, because i am a constant work in progress! i used to think i never knew the difference between right and wrong, and i think i've come pretty far since then maybe.

this was kind of a long and silly ramble... the universe should not have given me the ability to think about concepts like this because i get so in my head! Ta Ta for Now!

my really (un)interesting thoughts #9

found out gifcities existed in during post can you tell?

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its monyay! Yippee! im trying a new font cuz i saw other people using it and i was like Dis Is a lit font Holdup. but its kinda big. idk we will see. well anyway. i am so super stressed this week! but also its kind of my fault for doing nothing but play rhythm heaven all weekend... Awkward. i love rhythm heaven. and im so Friggin GOATEEDDDD at it! i almost completely beat the DS version!!! i have 46/50 perfects.... and the 4 i dont have perfected are freaking rhythm rally 1 & 2 and fill bots 1 & 2. BECAUSE THEY FREAKING SUCK AND ARE SO HARD! its ok one day. and i got all 50 medals in fever! but its rly hard to perfect anything on the wii.. i will grind it out one day....

bello the internet and...

"I'll get revenge. Pour bleach on your head, and now you're dead. Disinfect, so hold your breath and say goodbye!!!!!"

like idk. youd think after playing the piano for so long that i would be good and know how to like idk KNOW THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN MAJOR AND MINOR and know chords and scales. and know terms. but NO! i feel like ive been failed my whole life! what was i doing for 10+ years? its like they never cared about actually teaching me the instrument, but only cared about me passing my exams and getting the diploma so they could kick me out. makes me sad and like i wasted that time. but idk i gotta remind myself to enjoy the process. like i said last week! i got my period this weekend so i was especially moody. so keeping the mindset was hard... but i think i will manage! and i am still feeling happy. despite the immense amount of schoolwork i am currently procrastinating on. i have to stay consistent in SOMETHING. and that something will be these monyay posts!


anyways! im so tired rn but i have to grind out this monyay post for all my monyay fans (there are none its actually just me). i had my class thing tofay and it was so wierd my teacher nico was so out of it and he was like Yah i cant stop thinking about food. also Funny Moment he was referencing like an imaginary bass player in some jazz scenario to teach something and was using he him pronoun for this imaginary guy and HE GOES like "or she! Equal.. rights... Haha" LOLLLL that is too much what a Woke Hip Af king. maybe it was the lesiban bracelet i had on that made him Woke. also he called people that count triplets like 1 da da or seomthing freaks and i thought that was quite funny. althghough it is quite the embarassing that i really suck at the piano. and i messed up my freaking bossa nova too. like come on!

"but if you think that i'm not strong, you best watch out! nothing can stop me!!!!"

no lyrics but beautiful! im learning this on the piano right now. thx nico for PMO.



lyrics in portuguese i think. idk much about bossa nova but i do know this song gives me the chills when i listen!

this has kind of turned into a music blog tbh. since im alwyas posting on monyays. idk i guess thats just where the wind is taking me! and music has been especially relavent in my life. i feel honestly very happy with where i am right now and who ive become. like ive accepted things that used to bother me soo much and i like to be ME now! i used to say that i would rather be anyone else but me, but i dont think that is true anymore. i like being me now! and that is so awesome!! hey! hermitcraft season 10 likely starting this week im SO excited you dont even know. and tmrw is percy jackson day! so much to be excited for despite it all!!! i LOVE being excited! liike monyays! and it all! ive been sleeping in my sisters room every night. idk if thats because i miss her or because her bed is comfy but its nice. i do miss her a lot!! my birthday is coming up and i dont know what i will ask for. maybe an acoustic drum set. or rhythm heaven megamix! i want to ask for something more meaningful than clothes i think...

i cant believe i will be 17! thats kind of a big number. i am excited though... im almost off in college! i love the future because i will never know what is in it :3c. im so sleepy i am falling asleep here oh no! i have a presentation tomorrow TvT... and a ton of work. i wish i never had to sleep so i can have some time!!! Sighh. at least i get to sleep in tomorrow. and i will enjoy the process. im liking writing my ap seminar essay right now. i feel cool and professional writing a research paper like that and proud when i read it back. and then i write essays in other classes and im like Wow i can actually write! you know, i think this is the first time in like idk 4 years that ive felt good when i am alone. its the MONYAY MAGIC!!!!!! LOL!!!! anyways.... i might post more this week but im super tired right now and i need to sleep or ill die i think. love you all on the internet and ty for whoever reads these :3 HUGS AND KISSES 4EVER!

thrilling, is this love?

song from fan club minigame in Rhythm Heaven!

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Here is my song!

for YOU!

yeaaahhh that's RIGHT!

I wish that..........

But i'm too shy I suppose!


Hey now!

yeah! yeah! yeah!

If only I could just CONJURE a SPELL!

then YOU and I can be....

for all time, i suppose!





everyone. watch the video of her singing this RIGHT NOW!!! spreading the rhythm heaven propaganda!! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DNbvktlB0gU <--- THE LINK CLICK HERE!!!!!

my attempt at bieng an aesthetical multiverse collage girl

but failing. Sigh. One day.

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all da pics from Pinterest...

my really (un)interesting thoughts #8


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by Lush!

hAhahHaha Not today though.

song(S?) of the hour::::

although no really (un)interesting story this Monyay! ohhh Yeaaahhhh!!!!!!!! just some thoughts! i stayed home from school today so i had lotsssssss of time to THINK!!!! i had my first ONE HOUR freaking piano drum lesson of my GOD i dont tink ive ever had to think so hard in my life why is everything so HARD!!! i can be sooo confident but Naw at the day i kind of suck but you know what?!??! ITS SO FUN BEING BAD!!!!

like i dunno im really enjoying the process!! of LEARNING!! GOD. i think ive just recenrlty discovered the wonders of LEARNING. like i dont know theres just soooo much knowledge out there that i dont know and the prospect of having the opportunity to LEARN EVERYTHING is just so IDK. AWESOME! as stupid as it sounds LOLLLL.....

like omg. ive been playing piano my WHOLE life. since i was FIVE! and i just think its insane beacuse i may have been doing all that but truly ive only scratched the SURFACE! liike. i know NOTHING? its AWESOME!!! theres a WHOLE WORLD OUT THERE FOR ME TO LEARN! todaay my Guy was teaching me all this stuff... im kinda getting into jazz piano because, again, its a WHOLE NEW WORLD i know NOTHING ABOUT, and isnt that just so cool! anyways, he is teaching me jazz stuff and theory words. who the heck knows what Dorian and Mixolydian mean??? I DO NOW!! SINCE TODAY!

and oh MAN isnt that just so exciting. and its so HARD and im SO BAD but thats what PRACTICE IS FOR!!!!!!! and i learned BOSSA NOVA on the DRUMS?? HELLO ISNT THAT SOOO COOL??? I KNOW BOSSA NOVA NOW??? have i ever listened to bossa nova before today? HELL NO!!!! BUT NOW I HAVE!!!!!! GOD LIFE IS JUST SO AWESOME!!!! ive been feeling jsut soooo HAPPY recently!! like things are for real falling into place!!!!!!! and im sooooo ^_^!!!!!!

and oh have i been thinking. also my teacher gave me his SPOTIFY!!! which first of all he has given me way too much power i am going to be a terrible person but also HIS SPOTIFY IS SOOO COOL he has so many playlists to listen!! and also he MADE ME A JAZZ PLAYLIST?? oh my GOD!! sillys aside he cares SOO MUCH about music. like i can tell it is his passion and he cares genuinely about me learning it too and i think that is so awesome and i think that is what sets him apart! truly! idk. i just feel like ive started viewing EVERYTHING DIFFERENT NOW!!!!! music is just SO SPECIAL. its insane. i just truly think its the most beautiful art form. and its ALWAYS EXPANDING. there are ALWAYS new ideas! like god i LOVE weird and different sounding music.

obligatory monyay post! one day ill be normal i swear

by excuse 17!!!!

and maybe its cause i kidna grew up in a closed minded typa family who only listens to the poppular things (and hates on rap...) , but its amazing how much is our there. and i think i had a mental block where like. if it kinda sounds weird or bad... then its bad music. but idk. i think once everyone gets past the mind block of it sounding bad, it sounds SOOO GOOODD! genuinely. weird screamy or odd chords are so amazing and just so different. i LOVE hearing new sounds ive never heard. and theres so much out there that i havent heard and i wanna listen to it all! and maybe thats why i hate on rly popular music (sigh im sorry i sound so annoying.), not because the music itself is bad, but just because weve all heard it before! its not different sounding! and THATS why i dont like it i guess. to me it just feels so shallow.

amazing song i discovered 5 mins ago

by Antonio Carlos Jobim

and you know what im probably just Teenage GIrl discovers music rn and idk. embrace the process i suppose! ^_^. i think im about to start my period wwhich is why im all like this. but idk i think there is just soo much beauty in the world! its so awesome. i have so much love in me for everyone ever!!!!!!!! like i LOVE my best friend and i think that she is so special and awesome for real and i feel so special for getting the chance to even be her friend and that life ended out this way!!!! UGHGUGHGUHGH!!!! Oh Man. im suppperrr tired. i have school tomorrow and im so excited to see all my friends. not excited to do all my work though. sigghhh..... my lesson went well today. i think im getting better. i hope! that studio is really really hot though and i get all sweaty ewwww!!!! >_< i think im for sure a visual learner though and im glad i figured that out!

like ill be so real a lot of songs i rememeber just based on their album covers. ESPECIALLY vocaloid. GOD i love vocaloid omggg!!! but since most song titles are not english and i cant be bothered to translate or look it up like.. ican describe an album cover but not tell u the name LOL but that also goes for normal english music. :3c i like discovering things about myself. i think im getting to know myself more and more everyday and that makes me excited and happy. i used to hate myself becaue i knew nothing about myself or how i felt! but i feel like ive been so much better at that. and also i think im way happier with how i look now too. I AM JUST SO HAPPY!!!!! this is just the best ever. thanks multiverse for listening to my thoughts :3 sry if they sound kinda stupid today. im superrr tired >.<

me as a troll


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i drew me as a troll! trolls is pretty awesome!

i dont draw as much as i used to! its so fun!

my best friend loves trolls right now! and i love my best friend! so i made this.. idk..LOL!

i really like velvet and veneer!!! they are sooo cute and their song is so addicting!!!! ^_^

dats it! i just wanted to share because i rly like her :333

my really (un)interesting thoughts #7

itts 11:33 pm and im freakin out!!!!!!!!

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cute robot

i love this


it is me!


im trying a new template! i realized actually tho i SUCCCKKK at colors and color thoery... like OMGOGMOMG i made a trollsona OC!!!! and it took like 50 years to figure out colors lol it was so SASADDDDDDD!

well anyways. its late at night again! which means more thoughts about the world and myself in it i guess!

in my head i am constantly fighting the urge to spill all my thoughts to everyone ever. but im not sure if thats true.

i guess there is a few places i belong to. i have home, church, around best friends, in asb, in envirothon, and in my broadcast class! home is pretty self explanatory. i have to hide a big chunk of who i am, but i can relatively be the real me whilst hiding that. church i can also relatively be loud and outgoing everything at once, but also still hiding a big part of who i am. i think i act my truest self to my best friends. theres nothing for me to hide and i think thats the me that i self-condemn the most. i will talk and talk and talk, even if they don't care about what im saying, and that is ok. asb i become super quiet and observant. almost unapproachable! envirothon im the exact opposite. im loud and im the leader! and almost the same in broadcast, except a little bit different.... but i dont know how to say it with words.

ive been thinking about how i change personalities all the time! to the point where i have no idea how people perceive me.

in all those places people perceive me different. i belong in all those places! i dont really know where im going with this. i just think im stuck so much in my self perception of a mix of all my personalities that i have no idea actually how ANY of them perceive me!

but i guess perception is a weird thing anyways!! ^_^

and maybe it sounds like a joke

but its the truest thing ever and i think everyone should live by it!

i always say i have the YOLO mindset

even though it sounds silly. its true! you only live once! so LIVE!

im actually scared of who reads these... and ARE there consequences to my actions?! not so sure..... i dont think im physically capable of being one of those aesthetic cool deep thought girls.....well Baiii! :3c

my really (un)interesting thoughts #6


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GOOD DAY THE INTERNET INTERDUBS LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! im at school. this is a normal post rnn. Hold up. the day i can be normal about things will probably be the day (THAT NEVER HAPPENS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!). but like Yolo. you know what i am living on the Yolo mindset but my teacher was like Wut gurl dat doesnt maeeke sense...Freeekkuhhhhhhh.... but like idk. YOYLOLYOLYOLYOLOLYOLO. im so hungry. alsooooo im sooo sick of... Envirothon,,,,,, im like a FRAUDD i swear taht teacher sees a little Too much in me. like GUrl i got a B in aPES i am NOT a genius. maybe im just a bit loud. and oversharerer. DISGHGISHGIOSGHOISGHO

toadty this morning i had a Deep conbo with my mom in the car it was kind of interesting.. she said that my sister insd realy misses me and that shess super depresso espresso and like Basically thinks im the Best sister in the whole freaking world LOL JK. but Yah i was like literally about to cry liek OMg. i LOVE my sisters so much. they are like mybest freidns. wait OMG I CANT STOP SAYING "AF" IN FRONT OF TEACHERS OMG Wat ad heck Boi BE FRAEKING PROFESSIONALTREJDKSG

Girl Bai,., dat cat is witerally Me. i lost my phone and i thin k it was the scariest moment of my life. Butti. found it Yah Yeet. im hanging out with my BIFFLE BAE today and im so Hype AF to eat boba. Nya~ ^3^. its onlyWendsyaay. and im so sad. Hold up. OMG i was in APES today and my taecher and me r so CHill but maybe a little Too chill and so i was like Literaly falling asleep . and she gave me a freaking like anxiety relieving fidget TOY??????? and she was like. I Can Smell the Anxiety Radiating off you. thank you my queen but i am just Tired. I FELT SO BADD...

apes is just the most confusing class ever. does anyone like thje Trolololololol Epic Memzeeee i made hahahahahahahahaahaha.. Hah.Hahaha. my Biffle Bae rly likes trolls so i made it for her. actually its insane that PEOPLE WHO R LIKEING TROLLS ARE THRISTING OVER HICKORY. i read a horirble hickrory x branch fanficiton with my Biffle Bae and i think im sscarred for life. he is actually the most unattractive troll. NONE OF THE TROLLS ARE ATTRACTIVE??? Ur so perfect perfect perfect (trolls quote Haha Nyaaaa~~ :3)

i watcghed mean girls and. now i aam reflecting on my theatere kid phase. i think the drama teacher at my school crushed ALL MY DREAMS. what a FREAKING FREAK. Sigghhhhh.. nnyyaa~~ Duuuude. i think newsies was the best thingn taht has ever happened tio em OrNAw. maybe one day ill post all the newsies fffffffff......... K. Nbm. SEHFSDFKDHSFGKh. Happy..Wednesday.. Ugh. toda y i went around filming random peopele at school and i think people thought it was weird (it was). it was for a Cause Hah. Let Ur Freak Flag Fly (Le Epic Sherk Ref >.<) GOD this comptuer is hard to type on. Epic Bruh Moooomrent.

GOD we need to bring back the freaking TROLOLOLOLOLOL.. it was so Fiyuh. Combusting RNRNRNRN!!!!!!! Gurrrrrrl. GOD. we as a society neede to bring back LETTING OUR FREAK FLY. r-r oactiy;o think i nede to stop tlaking. i think i am too ironic to the point where its not ironic anymore. but people think im being ironic bnut they also dont know Hahaha.haAHaha. Maybe NOOEN of it is ironic. speaking of ironic: oh my. GOD. does anyone know that tik tok furry that does cute little k pop dances because i genuinely think that its the cutest thing to. ever exist and im SICK of hiding IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BRING BACK FURRIES!!!!!!!!!

Wow. these people are so weird. thank GOD im the only normal person here. DUUDE. i watched precy jacksojn show Eveey tuesday at 6 OCLOCK!! itssSOOO good im actually so super obsessed. not... as obssessed as i am with MINECRFAT!!!! omg. i think i am the same person that i was like idk 2 years ago. i got back into the mc speedrun community. Congrats Drip120 7:01 TROLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL. !!!!!!!!! OMGOGMOGM and freakign. FRUIBTERRIES MY D1 MOSUE DROPPER o ymh GOD!!! the PST life is actually so hard doe. God. you can take the girl out of minecraft but you can never take the minectaft out of the girl.

im super hungry and im scrared that i disappointedd my envirohton advisor because i didnt show up to a meeting! "its not like you brooke!!" is waht shes gonna say IGGJJGJGJ!!!! Holdup i think i just didn't eat lunch. omg i hate the STUPID APPLE FREAKING GIRLS WHO ARE OBSESSED WITH MEN and whispering their little things im acrually so sick of it i dont think im physically capable of talking to man obsessed people.. actually or people in general.... i feel so ISOLALTTEDELDEDDD! ok Sry bai Luv u All until the next time :3

my really (un)interesting thoughts #5

plain txt

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Hello internet! I have a lot of drafts on this website i will never post and that makes me saddddddddd. yo-yo-yo-yolo! You know what I've been thinking about? I feel like I kind of live in the mindset that some people "get it" and some people just don't get it. and maybe that's true in a sense but also maybe i shouldn't have such an exclusionary mindset. i guess i've been just really thinking about how i work and the world works recently!!!

and maybe im being naive or I'm thinking too deeply about it or something but that shocked me!! its just a lack of empathy i suppose! i just don't understand the point of like... idk.. being a person.. if you think like that? if you dont CARE about others???? idk... i think my brain hurts from thinking too hard about it. in hindsight, it makes senese that my friend thinks like that because thinking back on it, she often is not the most caring friend. which is okay, i love her anyways!

anyways what i was going to originally talk about,,, the whole "getting it" thing. i have been super stuck on that mindset because idk. theres justlike.. a large group of ppeople that i just do NOT get along with.... i just become super Awko Taco LOlololololl.. but its kind of silly? and exclusionary! i have my little mind list of the people i have so many mind lists... IDK IM THINKING TOO HARD ABOUT THINGS i think i shoudl CHillax...

and its weird!! how i will never be in anyone else's head but my own. my friend was talking to me about how she works and it was really interesting. the topic was something trivial like breaking up with her s/o but it was just the way she went about it! she told me that she has accepted that she is toxic and mean and that doing mean things doesn't really affect her. and i don't know WHY, but that really got me... like i just don't understand that. how could anyone have such a small mindset? how can you ACCEPT that you are a bad person without even trying to make an effort to be a good person?

not sure why but that really stuck with me. sometimes it feels like all the christians i know are all the meanest people i know. and in a way, that makes sense. they are christian because they need that support in their lives. and it's not like i can say anything, i am constantly lingering in some in between place. but maybe not making decisions isn't so bad!

history is just absolutely INSANE! its one of my favorite subjects but i hate my class.. but i like what we are learning.. right now its WWII! and god its like i am learning about the world for the first time over again or something i dont know how everyone else in my class isn't more shocked at how horrifying the past is. genuinely. i dont know why its affecting me so badly? i wonder why people don't really care. it really bothers me that ill never be in anyones mind but my own. im just too big a perfectionist. and probably a narcissist. i feel like probably narcissists think the way that i do. im so obsessed with myself and how i come off to others. Sigh.

ever since my breakup i have had way too much time alone which equates to way too much time to think which is just horrible NO ONE should ever leave me alone. terrible things happen. TERRIBLE THINGS! i need something to happen im stuck in horrible limbooooo!!! i dont know which is worse, being stuck in that relationship or being stuck in my own head. probably equal Tbh. but luckily, i fell very over it! the block button genuinely does wonders! i am realtively rly happy right now! just WAY to self obsessed and nitpicking my every move. maybe im a lot more like my dad than i thought... hm!

i feel like everyone on this website is so deep and i am just Not. Idk. i need sleep Get out of YOUR HEAD GIRL!!! goodnight internet!

my really (un)interesting thoughts #4

its too late 4 dis

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hi the internet! ^_^ its me againnn Lolll! and Oh man. its 11:51 pm and im stuck with my own mind. trying to fight slepeing. oh MAN. i was practicing my drums and dude. genuinely its so hard! at least jazz drums i feel like a fraud! annd aside from all my funny business, i think my teacher believes in me t oo much! like hes always telling me liiiiiike that im going liike rly well but like. i actually suck so bad! and i know practice makes perfect( which i freaking am omg)! but idk i feel like such a FRAUD all the time!!! my advisor for the team im on.. i have become super close with her but ive never had her as a teacher before

and when i tell u this lady believes in me she BELIEVES in me. its crazy! and its super nicebut i feel like ive totally fooled her into thinking im this awesome genius girl LOLOLOLLLL???? i feel like im FOOLING EVERONe into thinking im someone im not!!!!!!!!!!! and then one day... THeyll all Know. Ill get her AS A TEACHER and shell realize im not a genius and that i actually dont nkow anything *CRIESSSSSSSSSSS*. and its not like im not used to people believing in me! maybe i jutst dont bleieve in myself. but for gud reasonn i FR SUCK AT THE DRUMS oh my freaking god triplets are my worst enemy why would anyone do that to me i am foreal rage quitting! i think i just need people to stop caring so much abt my potential. or to stop believing in me so hard. or MAYBE im a narccissist. maybe i need to stop caring so much about everything!maybe ill keep this a short post! HAaha lol



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GOD internet. I AM SO SICK OF MEN "EXIStING" im goina to actually explode oh my GOD!@ its freaking MONYAY. because of FREAKING course it is. i dont konw what the FREAK is wrong with me/. PEACE 2 ALL FREAKS. I FREAKING GUESS. Gurl go die. anyFREAKING ways i was going to "monyay" lkesson as always. and GOD today was not my FREAKING day. Bro freaking quoted MLK the momenti said hai and i was like Wat. GIRL GO DIE WTF? and it was so HORRIBEL. im the mosst SOCIALLY AWKWARD PERSON TO EVER EXIST!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *cri*... bro sits RIGHT THERE watching... can see every freaking pore on my freaking DUMB AF FACE. oh ym god i was so SCARED. my face is like permanentply red or somehitng. FREAK AFREAKINGLERT!!!!! i FROGET everything. im so anxious. im so nervous. because King is like 2 freaking inches away from me. WHY? WHY WASNT HE AT HIS OWN FREAKING DRUM SET.

omg. UGH! then bro is like I forogont to give to playlsit ahadihdiahda I said iw as going to give u songs ADSJDNOLOLOLOLOLLO and ai be like HhahhaahHDahddhadha yYEYSEYSSS and hes Liek ok Ya gimme ur email. and i ggive my school email like a FREAK LOSER oh my GOD!! Because i actaullu check that IGUESS. Brah goes SLOloloolSry i didnt folow u back on Instagawwwwnnnnmmm i dont hate u Lol ur just a FREAK WEIRDO WHO KNOWS NOTHING ABOUT LIVING IN THIS WORLDLL!L!L!L!L!L!L!!D!DD!D!! im liike OhYah i get it. okok. I PLAY MY STUPID FREKAING O HMY GOD TRIPLETS THAT I SUCK AT im like OMg i forgot how to do this AGAIN BECAUSE HES SO CLOSE GET AWAY FROM ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! FREAKFREAKFREAK!!!!!! like GIRL oh my fos. So i play and im like SWEATING im SHAKING im so ANXIOUS WHY ARE YOU SO WEIERD AND SOCAILY AWKWARD AROUND EVERYONE!!?!??!?!?! I IT IS JUST GETTING WROSE AND AWORSE EVERY. DAY. HELLOOOO??!?!??! like im just this close from exploding my body

so i get through it. somehow. and its liek Omggmgg ur the best SUTPIDSDENT EVEERRRR liek e u be PRacticitnigng like bosss slike yessss im SOOOO glad i have someone that ACTAALLYYY practiess like ur AMAZAING~!!!!!! i be like aw Thx Aha. but Gurl u SUCK at accents its embarassing. Brah was gonna rage quit i Freigging sweawr. like Work on it and im like K. then Bra goes how was that Lead Sheett i gave u becau e im just SOO Othoughtful and i ACUTALLY CARE ABOUTTHE PEOPLE THAT I TEACHHH?!??!?!?!!? nd im lkeme Yah no James is a BEYOTCH and needs to LEAVE (teahing style Sux), gues i think sno one has atualy ever CARED ABOUT LEARNING OR SOMETHING BECFORE THIS like OH MY GOD. so oMGMGORIMGORGNO King says like If U WantI Can TeachYOu PIano HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

OFIMSOFNSOP. WHO THE HELL ACTAULLY CARES THIS MUCH?>?????!!?!? ?WHAT KIND OF FREAK AM I DEALING WITH THAT CAERES???????GOD WHAT IS HAPPENING???? like "Sorry i dont wanna Poach you" LIKE AN ELAPHENANT EWAHT??? (I pretended like i knew that that meant but i ddid not IDIIOT!!) i be like i GOTTT you Heheheh King is so WORRIED like say this and this and this and this and is like Yah Wiat Ur a SMART KID. you got this. SMART KID??????!?!?!?!?!???!?W@?! joh otm god. AA IA SMART KDKJSIKIKDIKDIS. BRo is showering me in comlplkiments like I know u r wanting to leanr and awhatevreim liike Aw thx (turning redder than i already am by the second my face is so hot u can like cook spam on it idk) GOD I HATE "LESBIANS" SFREAKING SICKOS ALLL OFNTHEM (/J)


Me going slowly more and more insane as each day passes:


LIKE GET OGG OF ME. i don tt think ive ever playd more horrible in my LIFE. i SUCK AT IT ALL. IM QSQUINTING FOR MY LIFE TO SEE THIS SHEET MUSIC THAT IS SO COMFUNSIING im so tense and sweaty and i feel. You atching my EVER.yY. MOVE. SOPT CARING SO MUHCH SOTPSOTPZOPSOTPOTPOTP. "THANKS" a LOT. Bro goes inot my DTuPIF JAMES BEYyoVH room and im like Zoning Out daydreamig about like idk emails or something or maybe going thoerugfh and overhinking ever single word i have UTTERED since i have WALKED through Athese freaking doors of PURGATORY. so much for "SMART KID". like Naw someone shoot me in the head right now. im like allWEierdnad Awakwrd like thx all tiny. i get the HARDEST FREAKING SHHEETTT MUSIC OG MY LIFE WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME??????

its horirble. and every. montay. is oinGOING TO GET SO MUCH WORSE its ALL DOUBLEING BY HORRIBLE AMOUNT LIKE OH my GOD IDK HOW ILL BE ABLE TO WIDTHSTAND THAT GOODDDD FIRBID JEUSS CHRIST. (refreshing m y emails rn) WAHT IF I GAEBTHE WRONG MAIL LIKE A IDIOT. iwould do that. annoyiongasssssssssss..... stupid Freking "DUDE" DRESSSSS LIKE A DUMB MASC LESBIAN ACT LIKE A MASC LESBIAN OH MY GOD CHOOSE A SIDE?@?!??!?!?!?! UR FOOLING US ALL U LITERALLY WIN. my type thought is RENNEE FREAKING RAPP i think i alke died at least 10 times every time she came on screen during mean girls im not lying i need her so bad. Do not get me started. Gurl/ iCANNT STOP OVERSHAINTG if i keep recognizing that i overshare maybe it will stop being a problemm like Haha ur so funny Girl! (UR NOT!)

I found all these pics on pinterest Btw.

My really (un)interesting story #2

dont read this im brainrotting this isnt normal

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so we play rebel girl. and i kinda suck as always but its whatevr! and its so fun! i love that song and its rly fun to play. and i learned cool new concepts~! and i loved it. and he was like Omg ive never rly taught punk so this is like new for me. and i was like :3. (keep in mind im actually the most AWKWARD GIRL EVER in ALL these INTERATIONS LOLOLOLOL!) god that song was awesome and we played it together with the speaker and it was so amazing. so then hes like... i can teach you some PIANO THEORY. AAGGGHH and i was like YISSSS!!!! he said "oh ya i dont rly play piano but i play VIBRAPHONE"???? GOD WHAT A FRREAKING GUY.

so we go in the piano room. im like idrk any theory. Lol. i can only read sheet music. Hah. so he's like ok so he teaches me a little stuff... some excersize and stuff i already know and then he teaches me the cricle of fourths (which i dont know!!! so aweseome) so hes like wat ru doing in piano? so i show him the Half Sheet of messed up writing Piano Teacehr James wrote me. and i was like OH ya i dont rly know.. i kinda just zone out in my classes bc he doesn't give me worksheets and he talks and he plays and i dont rly play and i need to be doing something to learn so i forgot everything Lol. and he was like Oh thats weird. i hope you dont feel that way abt my classes. and i was like OMGG no im actually playing. like its sos different. im fr learning from him. so then nico is so funny and is like yah he should be like... giving you stuff... you should say something....

so YES! fire amzing Monyay. AAMAZING start to the year! 1 hour and 10 whole minutes witj bae. Working. FREAKIN. OVERTIME. NO PAY. god jesus christ. it was amazing. ive peaked. Hahahaha IM SO NORMAL ABOUT EVERYTHING EVER JESUS HRIST. WHO ELSE DOES THIS PLEASE LET ME KNOW. i want so bad not to be me i think. i have more thoguths not abt this but i think this post is too long so ill make another post. :3

and so then he taught me new stuff! i get humbled so fast because i suck every time he teaches me stuff. just more practice for me! which i liked pracitcing. its fun ^_^! omg also he was like how was ur new year! and i was like omg i did nothing... Wbu? and he was like i saw The Drums in concert... i was like oh i never heard of them (IDIOT AF. i will listen NEOW. ugh). thats so COOOLL!!!! so yeah. cool fricking guy. anyways so he tauguht me all this stuff. hes taking on the TRUMPET which is so cool? and he was like "yep thats just what we do in this thing called music!" HEELLLOOO??? hee is jsut so Derp >.< also hes reading a freaking MILES DAVIS BIOGRAPHY AND IS INSPIRED OH MY GODDDDDDD im gonna loose my marbles.

anyways. let me tell you what happene d this Monyay. so i go. to my drum class. and King Niclo was like Hai and i was like Hai. wait im going too slow. we played jazz drums beats... whatever the term is.. which i freaking practiced myBUTTT off on! seriously. i did not stop playing until i was good at them. and i was good!!!!!! and he was like "omg ur gonna bring me to tears... none of my other students practiced" and i was like Omggzz Hahahaha :3.... (jazz drum is SUPER HARD!!! whatever swing stuff is CRAZY! it took me like 1 whole week nonstop practicing. so im rly proud!! i can see my progress.)

like jeez. soooo ya. soooo annnyways! my class ended and im supposed to have piano right after.. and guess what.. MY BEEYOTCH TEACHER JAMES WASNT FREAKIN THERE! i was like Omg. :( (but i dont like james hes kinda a bad teacher :P) so NICo wuz like... oh.... I can teach you for 30 more mins if you'd like :3 and i was like Heck FREAKIN YES! and so then we were the last ones in that studio bc the other teacher girl left... so we went to the drum room. and he was like So whatcha wanna do. and i was like ROCK SONG!!!! lets play REBEL GIRL BY BIKINI KILL!!!! and he was like yass.. whats that called.. riot grrl (stop feigning innocense. i know you know Nico) and i was like YISSS i love riot grrrl... and he was like Omg do u know Bratmobile and i was like YES!! Love them.

and i was like Yah i should.. so hes like you should give you like sheet music... and like... Not. and i was lke yeah. and he was like Omg sorry not to shit on him (HE ACTUALLY SAID THAT LOLOL. cursing funy) like he can teach however.. (backtracking af. but i agree with him) but you should do this and give him sheet music to teach you so you can like actualyly practice and learn! and ask questions! and i wa s like Yah thats my problem >.< but ya i hopefully will... he was like :3 (mr vibraphone. jeus fricking christ.) so we left. and i think today was the best day of my life. Fit was fire too. fishy t shirt. baggy jeans. white vans. and that freaking lesbian ass carabiner.

the drums the band he saw VVVVVV


the freaking VIBRAPHONE???! ^^^^

he told me to find jazz sheet music with this font!!!1

me being normal about everything:

hello! >_< it's me again. its the first day of 2024! today was really good! i won really good at Squishmallow Monopoly against my family. obviously. ^_^ and guess what! Its MONYAY!!!!!!!!!!!obviously. i was 3 weeks no monyay. but no. TODAy is monyay! and it was worth the 3 weeks. Lol. idk why i have brainrot. or Wut da heck is wron g with me for this. but i talked to my sister and she also gets like obsessions with people she think are cool. but i still feel like.idk. i think i should syart being normal. but its so funny in my head!

THIS IS SO UNTERESTING. i need to mind dump somehwere. winter break has caused me to have too many thoughtsand i cannot keep spamming my twitter and instagram. i need to overshare somewhere else. but i think the orgin is that i want to not be me so i want to be my coolo guy! so i will change everythuiig about myself. Yis. Uhgh. (FREAK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

my 4 favorite things

Oh my days!

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my really (un)interesting thoughts #3

sorry Haha.

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Hai. x3 &

nneewww theme who Dis? >:3 its FINALSSSSS WEEEEK! ohhh yeeaaahhh Ha.HahaHAhAH.. OMgOMg. its MONYAY. you know what that means. It;s 30 minutes of HELL DAY!!!!!!!!!!! sorry i meant to type H. E. double hockey sticks. im going to be so ereal. I am so FREAKING BAD at the drums. i ccan pretend like im good "oohh im good" IMM NOT GOOD and its so emarassning. yes ive been playing for like 3 months but that doesnt matter.Naw Naw NAwwwww

Erm ok. OMGOMOMG. back to talking about the newfound freedom ting. I have realized that ive REVERTED. back to my old obbsessions. LIKE.IFK howto explain it... the pressure to be a cool girl is GOOOOONNNNNNNNNEEEEEE and i can be who i truly am: an EthosLab ultra fangirl. Yes. YES. YESSSSSSSSS.>:3 xP -V- i spendt all the weekend. watching it. UGHGHGIURGHIOGHREIHU. im sick. SICK!!!!!!! u-u tjat one is so cute omg omg u-u -v- omgomg ^-^ :3.

ASLSO I CAN FREAKING ENJOY DEF FREAKING LEPPARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IM SO TIRED OF HIDING. this. is real. this is me. (dramatic) anyways i saw that KIKUO is going to a CONCERT NEAR ME!!! I. FREAKING. LOVE. KIKUO! im a kikuo fangirlzzzz TO THE MAX!!!! they r going on with Bo En. but i only know that one Omori song (ive never played or watched it in my life.). idk if ill go. because my one friend that said they wanted to go idk if they would go because i actually dont know them dat well. What. The. Bruh.

Erm.Ermmmmm. i saw a SPACE SHUTTLE yestrday at the SPACE CENETER and oh my god. it was the most awesome experience of my LIFE. no one understands hoiw much i FREAKING LOVE SPACE SHUTTLES. my MIND was BLOOOOWWWWWNNNN. if i was a troll from the movie Trolls Wold Tour idk what type. i. want to say FUnk but idk. maybe techno because they r so cute. Lol. i love trolls i want to watch the new movie prerrtty badly. How bad thouhg. you know what. i NEVER STUDY FOR ANYTHING. i have an 85 in my APES class right now waht the flip. i think thsis is so terrrible. im ghoing to olose it. i think senioritisi is hiting.... OMG the best song in thd world at this moment is freaking BUG. by KAIRIKI BEAR. YUESSSSS. OMGOMGOMG

i was trying to play the new gamemode on project sekai because i havent played it in a while and its SO HARD!@!!!!!!! i was dstruggling so hard. also they added Sanrio to ffreaking the game? i anyways. im useually so G-O-A-T-ed A.F. at that game and now im NOT. ugh. i think that all of this is all me jsut trying to convince myself.. that being a single pringle is good. IS IT THOUGH. thats it. i QUIT! im SICK of codependant lesbians. im turning Stirhgt for the love of my life (my drum teacher. who im seeing. today. 30 minutes..alone..in a room..with him..) UGH. who have i become. exactly who i swore to destroy: a man obsesser. except not really. i just watched this guy in my class pass his friend a weed vape XD thats so NAST. TIME AND PLACE BROTHERS AND SISTERS.TIME AND FREAKING PALCE! ur literally in a basic level united states history class. Calm. actually every single person in this class is SICK.

why is this pic of the challenger.. that genuinely is so so sad

OMGODKGLMG XDXD i just watched him take a hit. LOL. im going to throw up. right. NEOW. my back hurts. HElp. i think im stressed to go to.. my drum lesson.. and be even worse than before. how TF am i meant to.UGH!!! also i wanted to drive there on my own because i GOT MY FREAKING DRIVERS LICENSE but my parents arent letting me TvT Cri. independence when Wheennn! isnt it crazy. Naw staying positive. also i think i have a really big oversharing problem. like. REALLY big. i cant stop telling people my business! liek calm down boi nobody...HAha.PLEASE. someone needs to give me a tutorial on how to be norma.l. NOW. anyways. i like how monyays always make me overthink EVERY SINGLE word i say ever in the whole world and then when im reflecting i have to physically cringe. I ALWAYS HAVE TO SAY SOMETHING EMABBARASSING. (part of oversharing problem). its ok YOLO hahahaahhaha(NO) Mkay monyay is almost over so i need to psot this so baiiiiiii

Catdad. Plantdad. Trashrat.

i found this on a pinterest post caption of a cat next to a christmas tree. this is not m.e.

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58 y.o. gay from Germany,

just drop...

You want to know more about me???,

/reference Hahaha I swear im just a girl.

Love the beautiful and funny Things in the World ..........

Catdad, Plantdad, Trashrat,

Something about me....???

my really (un)interesting thoughts #2

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good afternoon little ones. *meows loudly*. im in my Boradcast class rn. and im SO BORED! i tried asking people if they were in love with anyone but i think they were too busy doing imoirtant things to answer. sighhhhhhhh. i took my APES FRQ today and i LEFT FOUR QUESTIONS BLANK LOL. awkward! i hate STUPID MATH why in the world would ANYONE PUT MATH IN APES!!???!?!?! whatever AF!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IM SO BORED!!!! everyone is like...folding tripods or something nerdy idk.

anyways. I GOT MY DRIVERS LICENSE YESTRDAY!!! i am being so real when i say that i am entering my awesome cool independent girl era. For Freaking Realzie!!! im gonna drive everywhere to all my lessons (with the love of my life. but i think im sick of that anyways. he updated his pfp on Instagram and he is wearing a FREAKING NEWSIES HAT?HELP. i love newsies. i think its a sign. anyways he is doing a DERP FACE in his pfp. I LOVE HIM. (i need to be him RIGHT NOW))

ROFLCOPTER!!!!!!!!!!!! :3c

Erm anyways. i forghot waht i was saying. Oh ya the other love of my life talked to me today. he Dapped me up. i started swooning right then and there. it was soooooooooooo cuuutteeee. (im going to THROW UP RIGHT NOW. no im not. i neeedd himm!!!!!). this is all part of me being a new girl. a new point..in..my...life....YES. HahaAhaahAhAHA. AWKWARD!!!! im feeling EXTREME pressure right neownewoennemmeoreeowmrMRREOOWWW.. oh my god. you know what i LOVE? COMIC SANS. im so freaking TIRED of all the STUPID FREAKING PEOPLOE HATING on. COMIC FREAKING SANS. literally the scum of this stupid world. Sorry. I didn't mean that (i did). Erm. Awkward!

stupid ugly freaking nerdy cat needs to DIE!


OMG. you know what is ALSO a part of being newly independently cool and awesome??? WATCHING. HERMITCRAFT. you may be like "ewwww.." NO. I LOVE ETHOSLAB. i watched ethos secrety life #1 yesterdya and i was like. Wow. I missed this. I missed him. we need to throw it back. truly. omg. i am trying to quit tik tok and stop being addicted to my phone and i think i am failing. i literally deleted tik tok but now im on YOUTUBE which is INFINITELY worse... maybe? the videos are longer.... OH MY GOD. everyone in my class is revealing THEY LIKE/D HERMTIT CRAFT. no one here knows i secrelty had a twitter stan account for hermit craft. BLESS UP. maybe ill post on there again. WE NEED TO THROW IT BAC.K. now that i am a new person

THE MAN!!!!!!!!

actually im SO SICK OF TWITTEEERRR!!!!!!!!!!!! they all say the SAME THINGS on there. and thwn i feel so sad when im on it. Sigh. So Depresso Espresso. i need to read like a book or something. but Naw. Nawwwwwwwwwww. I HAVE NO MOTIVATION FOR ANYTHING!!!!! Ever. but No. if im keeping the mindset. THE MINDEST! ILL BE NEW. TvT. omg. i was listening to Kairaiki bear freaking BUG the song and it is SO GOOD!! These SICK PEOPLE next to me are watching MumboJumbo hermitcraft season 9. i thinkk this is it and i go to the afterlife neowmeow. God Bless America (God Bless Hermicraft) I LOVE MUMBO WAITTTTTTT.... *cries and sobs*

K. they stopped wagtching it. Nevermind. they. r watcing anime? Nerd Alert!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Lolzzzzzzzzz!!!! I HAVE THREE MINUTES LEFT UNTIL I DIE!!!!!!! HESLLLLPPPP ME RIGHT NIOW. if i have to go home today and do something ill die. DIE RN@!!!!!!!!!! OMG. i love RHYHM GAMESSSS SSOOOO MUCCCHHHHHH. OMGOMOMG IM ON THE COVER OF MY SCHOOL NEWSPAPER IM SOOO EXCITED!!! YAYAYY!!! I FEEL SO FAMOUS!!! BEST AWESOMETHING EVER! ok i need to go pay attention in history class now. Bai! Love and Peace 4ever <3 :3

my really (un)interesting thoughts #1

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Happy Coolsday! in my ap seminar class right neown enoeenowneoneennmereeeoowww. that fire cat is me BTW its my selfie. Lol. i love the font comic sans. JustCantGetEnoguh (by the black eyed peas!!!!!!!!!!). today imm on fire. Kinda. I NEED WINTER BREAK TO START. i need to buy christmas presents. UGHH. thats so hard. its really hot in this classroom right now. OMG my face turns red so EASILY. its actually kind of rly embarassing. yesrterday i was in Monyay class with the LOML and i swear idk waht the eff is wrong with that place but my face was getting so red.

this mornining i got starbies matcha latte with oatmiklk and vanilla coldfoam. im so afficted its so GOOD OSSOSOS goofdddddd actualyl omg.z. Bussin'! BUTTTTTTTT ANYWAYS OMG my freaking dumb stupid HI-HAT AND THE CRASH ON MY STUPID ELECTRIC DRUM KIT BROKE OH MY GOD IVE HAD IT FOR LIKE THREE MONTHS I LITERALLY JUST BOUGHT IT!!! im so genuinely upset. i was so sad yesterday i started listening to sad music. oh my gof speaking of

i think that being a lesbian has granted me the power of curating and creating the most specific curated hyperspecific playlists known to man. i think someone could pay me for it i swear. i was like i need to make a hyperspeciifc playlist that specpfically has these lyerics but also sounds this way. and i did it Ez Claps. i think thats my lesbian magical power. i made a rly good one yesterday about Moving On and being an Empowered young gal. (kinda.) i love you fiona apple and kings of convenience. God Bless America. (and im fs not going to the mall on saturday. IDIOT!!!!!)

kings of convenience! (perks of being a lesbian)

im making it rrainbow can you tell?! omg. i was on the Gram (as one does) and thius. girl. from my ASB CLASS genuionely i dont think i have more hate in me. she did her stupid af insta post going to disneyland her caption? was "so acoustic <3". girl. GIRL. i hate everyone ur so ANNOYING and unfunny. Ok. sorry Love & Peace!!!!!! Love you.. queen. Lol. UGH. UGGGHH. whatever. i am addicted to my phone anyways. i need to get out into this world and do things with my life! now that im a new girl... im a new girl Independent awesome and i make my own decisions!


ooookkaayyyy. anywayas.ssssssss. waht else.. i talked to a british person yestrday it was crazy she was so cockney. and also UGH. i hate people with supprotive parents (lie) (whatever IDC) (jelly AF). You gotta do waht u gotta do ig. is it bad that i make thsese posts soso long???? i like making them long because they r aesthetical... but i feel like everyone else on this website makes their posts short but probably puts more effort into making them aesthetical. Idk. Its Chikll.

this is an actual image of the supportive ally cockney british lady i talked to. i wonder if her kid is gonna go to my shcool.

"Ello can you tell me what ASB stands for Idk this American Lingo still getin used tu it!" - her

me when i pass my drivers test on THURSDAY! VVV

mreow. im taking my drivers test on thurdssay. im scared i wont pas it. if i dont ill be so embarassed probbly. i want jamba juice though. Sigh. ok Neow im in my 5hth period. HAhahahaahhahaahah. i just summoned someone CRAZY from their 5th period to takea pic. Wow. #Healing..... (okay. LOL)!!!!!!!!! i think im making a bad decision to go to da mall with da X-GF on saturday. maybe...i need to go back on that decision. but also i need to Stay Nice. idk.. this whole thing is rly weird. im liking da Single Pringle life tho (i can be in love with random Men! and be truly myself without Someone thinnking im CHEATING ON THEM!!!!!!!!!!!! Erm. Awko!!!!!!!!!!)


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Hey everyone. and......

OOh man. I love mondays. today is thje day i get to see the LOVE OF MY LIFE.

and today is also the day i see if Heknows. sigh.SIGGGHHH


fave albums of all timezies!

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Haiiiiiiiizziezzzzzzz & Welcome 2



This is 100% the best album to exist. NO MISSES. every song is FIre. it was hard to pick a #1. they are all my #1 (other than Plateu Phase... that one is SO GOOD but def not the best on the album :3)



This album is FIRE. i was listening to it this morning and i was like Oh man im Jammin the flip out! Also hard to pick a #1. special mention to Speak, See, Remember & Spit on a Stranger. SOOOOO FIRRRRE

IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER! but also not of all time... kind of just.. my favorite albums at the moment. im sure it will change in like a month. LOLZ

Heavenly ALL THE WAY!!!! this album is awesome. me and my madness is just the most beautifully composed song. not to mention sperm meets egg, so what? SO FIRE!









EVERY. SONG. IS. A. HIT! this album is awesome. i listen to it when im sad lowkey. or mad. or when i like to feel like a weird girl. TIMELIMIT KOIBITO single handedly got me through a breakup i swear.

This is so embarassing but id be lying to myself if i didnt add this. Sigh. its so good. i love newsies with all my heart. i know every word by heart. BEST MUSICAL (no bias)!


THIS ENTIRE ALZBUM IS SO NICE AND BEAUTIFUL words cant explain it makes me want to frolic everywhere. so many sounds but they fit together so well.. so beauutiful. and fire.




I CANT STOP LISTENING TO THIS ALBUM. its so good. ifeel so empowered listening to it. EVERYTHING IS SO FIRE. i know like so many of these on the pian`o. its just so GOOD idk how to explain. every song hits.



YESYESSS! 90s GAY ALBUM?!?!?!?!?!!! so. good. i wish you were a girl. omg. chromatically decliing me? OMG. makes me feel so many ways. good to listen to when ur sad fs. the lyrics r so unique too. awesome.



i had to add this lovelty classic in here. so unique. OBBVI its led zeppelin... literally stairway to heaven album there is no beating that. every one. so. fire. have you lived if you havent listened to this?

This album makes me feel so many Emosions. it is perfect for when you are just waking up in the monring and want to be Hype Af! its just so . nice . to listen too idk how to explain. FUN FACT: i saw TD live! (they played logos!)

Love you all. BAI!

Thanks for listening! music is my pasison in everythhing. WHAT IS LIFE WITHOUT IT! but i need to stop being so pretentious about it. but thats a convo for another day.

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I'm so normal about everything ever

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T-T *sobs*

Naw but Fr. i need to be osbsessed with a person (thast not...... Them..) or else ill probably not be able to function. so its all okay. i am DISTTTRACCTTTTEDDDDDDDDD from da life da life da life AAGGGHHH at least funn distraction omg all their friends are here WHAT IF THEY ALL HATE ME BECAUSE I FREKAING BROKE UP WITH THEMEEMENRSJNKJSNKJSNKJGHSKLGHSKJGHK .

Haha WHen you tru your best but you don't succeedd..... (depressing depresso edpresso) (i did not try my best... im a little Stupid.) Nvm everyone. ONE WEEK UNTIL (dreaded) MONDAY.


am i allowed to post things lke dis... who is wathicng... am scared.... ii think my passion in life is oversharing on the internet. SOMEONE HELP!!!!